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The Sutherland Shire Gazette

Serving Sutherland Shire's finest satirical local news since 2024

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Man in suit stands with clipboard by "FOR SALE" sign on suburban street. Headline reads: "Boom Time Returns!" Bright, sunny day.

Man in suit stands with clipboard by "FOR SALE" sign on suburban street. Headline reads: "Boom Time Returns!" Bright, sunny day.

BOOM TIME RETURNS! – Shire Real Estate Agents Emerge from Hibernation as RBA Cuts Interest Rates

Feb 192 min read

Crowd with camping gear waits outside JB Hi-Fi in anticipation. Night setting, warm lights from the store. Headline text discusses rate cuts

Crowd with camping gear waits outside JB Hi-Fi in anticipation. Night setting, warm lights from the store. Headline text discusses rate cuts

Shire Locals Camp Outside JB Hi-Fi in Wild Celebration of Possible Interest Rate Cuts

Feb 182 min read

Man with gray beard examining electric lawn mower in a sunny garden. Headline reads: "Local Dad Baffled..." under "Sutherland Shire Gazette."

Man with gray beard examining electric lawn mower in a sunny garden. Headline reads: "Local Dad Baffled..." under "Sutherland Shire Gazette."

Local Boomer Dad Baffled by Newfangled Electric Mower: ‘Where’s the Two-Stroke?

Feb 162 min read

Collage of outdoor facebook marketplace adverts for outdoor wicker lounge sets, and Headline: "SHIRE'S MOST WANTED." scam

Collage of outdoor facebook marketplace adverts for outdoor wicker lounge sets, and Headline: "SHIRE'S MOST WANTED." scam

Shire's Most Wanted: The Outdoor Lounge That Keeps Getting 'Resold' - But Never Gets Delivered!

Feb 152 min read

Male and Female Couple kissing on a train platform, with text about train strikes on Valentine's Day. Background shows train tracks and station signs. Romantic mood.

Male and Female Couple kissing on a train platform, with text about train strikes on Valentine's Day. Background shows train tracks and station signs. Romantic mood.

Love Delayed is Love Found: Train Strikes Return for Valentine’s Day Special

Feb 142 min read

Woman typing on a computer at a desk with warning about a job scam. Geocities login screen displayed. Text details security alert.

Woman typing on a computer at a desk with warning about a job scam. Geocities login screen displayed. Text details security alert.

Data Entry Scam Strikes: Sutherland Shire Residents Warned Not to Hand Over Their Lives

Feb 132 min read

Bonnie Vale boat ramp closure for Australia Day. Locals upset. Media release on waterfront image. Sutherland Shire Gazette.

Bonnie Vale boat ramp closure for Australia Day. Locals upset. Media release on waterfront image. Sutherland Shire Gazette.

Bonnie Vale Boat Ramp Mysteriously Shut For Australia Day Weekend - Locals Smell a Stitch-Up

Feb 122 min read

Ford Range Raptor ute with green P-plates at intersection, surrounded by cars and pedestrians. Traffic light shows green. Headline about P-plater featured.

Ford Range Raptor ute with green P-plates at intersection, surrounded by cars and pedestrians. Traffic light shows green. Headline about P-plater featured.

Local P-Plater in Ford Ranger Raptor Clearly the Most Important Person in the Shire

Feb 112 min read

Woman pushing Aldi shopping trolley with a mountain goat statue inside, in front of Southgate shopping centre. Text above reads: "EXCLUSIVE: Southgate..."

Woman pushing Aldi shopping trolley with a mountain goat statue inside, in front of Southgate shopping centre. Text above reads: "EXCLUSIVE: Southgate..."

Southgate Showdown: Aldi Rumours Send Shoppers Into Meltdown

Feb 101 min read

Street scene with tipped garbage bins in a suburban area, trees lining the road. Headline: "Bonnet Bay Bin Carnage: Like Mad Max."

Street scene with tipped garbage bins in a suburban area, trees lining the road. Headline: "Bonnet Bay Bin Carnage: Like Mad Max."

Bonnet Bay Garbage Bin Carnage: “It’s Like a Scene from Mad Max”

Feb 92 min read

Athletes in colorful gear race on Wanda Beach, with a crowd in the background. Headline and details about the Sydney Branch Champs overlay.

Athletes in colorful gear race on Wanda Beach, with a crowd in the background. Headline and details about the Sydney Branch Champs overlay.

Wanda Beach Gears Up for the Most Prestigious Race of the Sydney Branch Champs: The Sand Hose Chase

Feb 82 min read

Split image: left shows a sandy riverbank with trees and a single abandoned croc shoe on the sand, right shows vintage boats on water. Text reads "Port Hacking Regatta in Jeopardy."

Split image: left shows a sandy riverbank with trees and a single abandoned croc shoe on the sand, right shows vintage boats on water. Text reads "Port Hacking Regatta in Jeopardy."

Port Hacking Putters Regatta in Jeopardy After “Croc Sighting”

Feb 72 min read

Woman Property Manager smiling in front of apartments with "For Lease" sign. Headline above: "Tenant gets 100% bond back." Evening setting, urban area.

Woman Property Manager smiling in front of apartments with "For Lease" sign. Headline above: "Tenant gets 100% bond back." Evening setting, urban area.

Miranda Woman Shatters Local Myth: First Tenant Ever to Get 100% Bond Back Without a Shouting Match

Feb 62 min read

Bathroom door with a "BUSY" sign on the handle. Text above reads: "Local Parents Celebrate First Silent Wee of the Year."

Bathroom door with a "BUSY" sign on the handle. Text above reads: "Local Parents Celebrate First Silent Wee of the Year."

Local Parents Celebrate First Silent Wee of the Year

Feb 52 min read

News headline about Woronora's Chinese restaurant getting a posthumous Michelin star. Background shows the Woronora RSL building and War Memorial in the car park

News headline about Woronora's Chinese restaurant getting a posthumous Michelin star. Background shows the Woronora RSL building and War Memorial in the car park

Woronora’s Legendary Chinese Restaurant Awarded Posthumous Michelin Star—Locals Say ‘About Time!’

Feb 42 min read

Street view of Box Road Jannali and another insert photo with a cap and bumper sticker labelled "JANNALI: living the dream." Headline reads "Casino Precinct to Replace Whatever’s Left."

Street view of Box Road Jannali and another insert photo with a cap and bumper sticker labelled "JANNALI: living the dream." Headline reads "Casino Precinct to Replace Whatever’s Left."

Jannali’s Next Big Gamble: Casino Precinct to Replace Whatever’s Left in Jannali's Masterplan

Feb 32 min read

Mannequin in colourful dress stands in a tree outside a house. Headline reads "Heads Will Roll - Mannequin Theft Sparks Frenzy in Gymea."

Mannequin in colourful dress stands in a tree outside a house. Headline reads "Heads Will Roll - Mannequin Theft Sparks Frenzy in Gymea."

Heads Will Roll: Mannequin Theft Sparks Frenzy in Gymea

Feb 12 min read

Shire Boarding School Headmaster smiling on a beach with a Boarding school resembling Hogwarts castle in the background. Text: Exclusive article about school holidays and boarding school rumors. Mood is whimsical.

Shire Boarding School Headmaster smiling on a beach with a Boarding school resembling Hogwarts castle in the background. Text: Exclusive article about school holidays and boarding school rumors. Mood is whimsical.

Longest School Holidays on Record Push Shire Parents to Breaking Point: Rumours of Cronulla Boarding School Emerge

Jan 312 min read

Commuters at Sutherland Station notice someone wearing unique leather-toed shoes. The mood is surprised. Text: Sutherland Shire Gazette.

Commuters at Sutherland Station notice someone wearing unique leather-toed shoes. The mood is surprised. Text: Sutherland Shire Gazette.

Commuter Causes Stir at Sutherland Station with Outrageous Leather-Toed Shoes

Jan 302 min read

Coach in blue kit with a whistle on a soccer field, parents and spectators in background. Headline: Dreams of the World Cup: Shire Parents Pin Hopes on School Holiday Soccer Camps.

Coach in blue kit with a whistle on a soccer field, parents and spectators in background. Headline: Dreams of the World Cup: Shire Parents Pin Hopes on School Holiday Soccer Camps.

Dreams of the World Cup: Shire Parents Pin Hopes on School Holiday Soccer Camps

Jan 292 min read

Two men hold a "Sandy Point Forever" sign in a park, amidst trees. They wear casual clothes and serious expressions.

Two men hold a "Sandy Point Forever" sign in a park, amidst trees. They wear casual clothes and serious expressions.

Sandy Point Tug-of-War: Sutherland Shire vs Liverpool in Boundary Battle

Jan 292 min read

Film crew setups outside Rydges hotel by the beach at sunset. Headline: "BREAKING: The White Lotus Rumoured To Be Eyeing Rydges Cronulla."

Film crew setups outside Rydges hotel by the beach at sunset. Headline: "BREAKING: The White Lotus Rumoured To Be Eyeing Rydges Cronulla."

Rumor Mill: The White Lotus Eyeing Rydges Cronulla for Next Season

Jan 282 min read

Sutherland Shire Gazette Headline: "Cheers to the Garbos: sutherland Shire's Boxing Day Bonanza". Image of beer six-pack on green bins. Suburban background, blue sky.

Sutherland Shire Gazette Headline: "Cheers to the Garbos: sutherland Shire's Boxing Day Bonanza". Image of beer six-pack on green bins. Suburban background, blue sky.

Cheers To The Garbos: Sutherland Shire’s Boxing Day Beer Bonanza

Jan 262 min read

Blue car parked on street in front of a house across the driveway blocking access. Headline and details overlayed about a local feud.

Blue car parked on street in front of a house across the driveway blocking access. Headline and details overlayed about a local feud.

Beach Day Blowout: Cronulla Driveway Drama Sparks Local Feud

Jan 262 min read

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