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The Sutherland Shire Gazette
Serving Sutherland Shire's finest satirical local news since 2024
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BREAKING: Local Couple Locked in Covert Smuggling War — Guitar Pedals and Craft Vinyl at Centre of Domestic Deception
19 hours ago
2 min read
BREAKING: Search Underway for Retired Local Man Last Seen On E-Bike Heading Eastbound on Captain Cook Drive - Estimated Arrival, Sunday.
2 days ago
2 min read
EXCLUSIVE: More Dumbbells and Kettles Than Parking Spaces - Sutherland Shire Council To Declare “Protected Muscle Zone” for Kirrawee and Taren Point.
5 days ago
1 min read
UPDATE: Shire Residents Returning from Oasis Concert Now Declaring 2025 ‘Best Year Since 1998’
5 days ago
2 min read
BREAKING: Shire Parents Re-Enter Western Sydney Orbit for Oasis Concert - Babysitters Invoke Surge Pricing
Nov 7
1 min read
New Study Confirms School Shoes Genetically Engineered to Disintegrate Halfway Through Term 4
Nov 6
1 min read
BREAKING: Shire Man’s 3-Hour Quest for Cash Exposes Grim Truth — Cash Is King, But the Kingdom’s Gone
Nov 5
2 min read
EXCLUSIVE: Trevor the Dachshund Discovered Busking in Cronulla Mall — Claims Local Bands Would Be “Lucky to Have Him”
Nov 4
2 min read
‘Make It Stop’: Channel-Billed Cuckoos Return from Papua New Guinea Holiday to Terrorise the Shire Once Again
Nov 3
1 min read
Ghost of Development Applications Past Spotted Haunting Sutherland Shire Council Chambers
Oct 31
1 min read
Locals Call for Dedicated ‘Wheelie Lane’ Across Captain Cook Bridge to Support Youth Innovation
Oct 27
1 min read
EXCLUSIVE: Inside the Croydon Street Cronulla Car Park Hoax - Sign Still Claiming 405 Spaces Available - Locals Demand Proof.
Oct 25
1 min read
A SUBURB MOURNS: Roadside Vigil Held in Loftus for Fallen DIY Shed Project. Put Your Wrenches Out.
Oct 19
1 min read
Holiday Horror Averted: Decorative 4WD Recovery Boards Finally Justify Their Existence at Easts Beach
Oct 6
2 min read
“Still Got a Few Stomps Left”: Local Man Refuses to Replace Iconic Tyre Bead Doormat After 34 Years
Sep 21
2 min read
Shire Man Crosses Georges River, Orders Long Black Coffee, Accidentally Unlocks Alternate Universe
Sep 20
1 min read
Mass Shire Exodus to Bali: Child-Free Flee the Children, Parents Flee the Peak Prices
Sep 19
1 min read
Shire Lobby Group Demands Council Legislate Cushion Caps Before Beds Disappear Altogether
Sep 15
1 min read
Cross-Street Standoff - Local Dog Owner, Missing Entire Point of Your Polite Panic
Sep 14
2 min read
When Your Newspaper's Too Wet To Burn and So Are Your Hopes For The Sharks
Sep 13
2 min read
Collective Exhale Detected as Commuters Cross Como Bridge, Officially ‘Home’ Even if Still 20 Minutes From Driveway
Sep 12
1 min read
EXCLUSIVE INVESTIGATION: The Shire Suburb No Map Will Show You - Inside the Hunt For Sunny Glen. Locals Demand Answers.
Sep 11
2 min read
Shire Husband Enforces “One In, One Out” Cushion Policy After Bed Disappears Under Decorative Mountain
Sep 10
2 min read
Trevor the Dachshund Declares War on Strata Committee, Rostrevor St Braces for Impact
Sep 9
2 min read
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