Holiday Horror Averted: Decorative 4WD Recovery Boards Finally Justify Their Existence at Easts Beach

Chris T Tide | Foreign Correspondent | Sutherland Shire Gazette

6 October 2025

KIAMA - Holidaymakers at Kiama’s Easts Beach Holiday Park awoke to scenes of chaos this morning as a Sutherland Shire family’s 4WD became dangerously bogged in what witnesses described as “a swamp-like patch of damp grass” next to an otherwise harmless paved roadway.

Children clutched their Zooper Doopers. Retirees froze mid–Sudoku. A concerned onlooker whispered, “I thought we were going to lose them,” as the LandCruiser’s back wheels spun furiously, flinging mud in every direction like a blender set to purée.

But just as catastrophe loomed, hope emerged from above. Spotted glinting in the morning sun, mounted proudly on the roof of the stricken vehicle, were two fluorescent orange 4WD recovery boards - accessories long dismissed as nothing more than Shire dad décor. Gasps rippled through the crowd as a nearby camper leapt into action, unbolting the boards with the precision of MacGyver disarming a bomb.

Within minutes, the boards were wedged under the sinking tyres. The 4WD roared forward, freed from its muddy tomb to rapturous applause. One witness compared the moment to “watching a plane land on the Hudson.” Another said, “If those boards weren’t there, I don’t even want to think about what could’ve happened.”

Experts estimate that 83% of recovery boards in the Shire never touch soil, instead living out their days as UV-faded ornaments in Westfield Miranda car parks. But today, these particular boards fulfilled their destiny.

The relieved owner later confirmed he would be returning home to the Shire with pride, deliberately leaving a crust of mud caked around the mudguards and bumper bar. “The neighbours need to know I’ve been places,” he said, already practicing his casual shrug for driveway conversations.

The Shire Gazette can only conclude: in the world of Shire accessories, even the most ornamental gadget can one day save lives - or at least, save face.