Father's Day Exclusive: Family Begs For Amnesty After Dad Deploys Full Arsenal of Dad Jokes Before Noon

Sandy Shores | Editor-in-Chief | Sutherland Shire Gazette

7 September 2025

Father’s Day celebrations across the Sutherland Shire reached breaking point today when local dad, Mick of Como, reportedly unleashed a barrage of dad jokes that left his family teetering on the brink of psychological collapse.

Eyewitnesses confirm the situation escalated quickly, beginning with a mild pun about the “rare” steak being “well done.” By joke number twelve, Greg had moved onto referencing every guest’s name in increasingly tenuous wordplay. (“Hey Claire, you’re looking clair-ly fabulous today.”)

Family members staged what they called an intervention by joke number 47. “It was either we stopped him or Father’s Day lunch was going to turn into a hostage situation,” said daughter Sophie. “Mum nearly lost it when he asked if the pavlova was pav-licious for the third time.”

Psychologists at the University of Helensburgh have since weighed in, confirming that dad jokes operate like carbon emissions: tolerable in small doses, catastrophic when left unchecked. “There’s only so many times a family can politely chuckle at a pun about sausages before they start googling adoption agencies,” said one researcher.

Greg himself remains unrepentant. “It’s a dad’s duty,” he told reporters while brandishing a set of novelty socks. “If I don’t say I’m outstanding in my field while standing in the backyard, then who will?”

Locals are divided. Some argue the dad joke tradition should be preserved as cultural heritage. Others say it’s time to limit dads to five pre-approved puns per day.

As for Greg’s family, they’re considering boycotting Christmas unless he agrees to a legally binding “pun cap.”