BREAKING: Local Man Launches GoFundMe to Help Residents Born Without Humour Chromosome — Promises “Satire Infusion” From Barry Humphries Gene Bank.

Finn Seabrook | Local Correspondent | Sutherland Shire Gazette

6 December 2025

After several turbulent weeks in which multiple Shire Gazette readers expressed shock, outrage, and deep confusion that a satirical publication might occasionally post satire, brave local man Max, has taken decisive action - announcing a GoFundMe to support those “tragically born without the humour chromosome.”

The fundraiser, designed to provide recipients with stem-cell transplants from the Barry Humphries Memorial Gene Bank plus a bonus “satire infusion”, has spread faster than a rumour about increased council rates.

“This is a humanitarian issue,” Max told the Shire Gazette. “Every day, innocent people scroll Facebook, see a fictional photo used on a fictional story, and immediately post 700-word essays about journalistic ethics. Many of them haven’t laughed since the Great Engadine Maccas Incident.”

Council has expressed interest in the program, noting it could dramatically reduce the number of residents emailing them to ask whether the Cronulla Mall solar-powered sausage sizzle slippery slide is actually being built.

But the real twist?

Max’s sudden rise to civic fame has reportedly shaken the Local Hero of the Year leaderboard - with insiders claiming he has overtaken Trevor the Dachshund in the People’s Choice tally.

“It’s unprecedented,” said one awards volunteer. “Trevor’s been untouchable all year. But curing humourlessness? That’s Nobel Prize territory.”

As for whether the treatment is permanent, Max remains cautious.

“One flare-up in the comments section about e-bikes and all progress is lost.”

Still, for the first time in years, the Shire has hope.

The Gazette also extends a warm, carefully worded apology to those who mistook our satire for literal journalism - and to anyone who injured themselves laughing not at the article, but at the comments section, which, as always, delivered the true comedic performance.