EXCLUSIVE: Trevor the Dachshund Retreats to Far Kurnell for ‘Reputation Reset’ — Promises He’s “Reflecting, Rebranding, and Resting My Public Image”.

Sandy Shores | Editor-in-Chief | Sutherland Shire Gazette

25 November 2025

KURNELL - In the wake of his Skeeta’s meltdown, failed open-mic debut, and the now-infamous “e-bike ankle-nipping incident,” Trevor the Dachshund has announced he is taking a temporary leave of absence from Rostrevor Street to “focus on healing and strategic reinvention.”

Sources close to the situation (Jess) confirmed that an intervention was held on Sunday morning after Trevor returned home covered in BBQ Shapes crumbs, smelling faintly of Jannali nightlife and disappointment.

“He needs time and space,” Jess said gently, while buckling him into the back seat for his getaway. “And somewhere far enough away that he can’t nip any more cyclists.”

Trevor has since been relocated to a quiet, picturesque residence in Far Kurnell - a beautiful remote sanctuary traditionally used by Shire residents undergoing either spiritual realignment or hangovers so large they require horizon views.

Locals report sightings of Trevor pacing the dunes of Silver Beach Dog Beach, staring pensively into Botany Bay like a small, disgraced politician considering a comeback. Witnesses say he has already barked at two pelicans and attempted to “introduce himself” to a stingray.

In a written statement pinned dramatically to a driftwood log, Trevor assured fans he is “safe, reflective, and absolutely still in the running for Local Citizen of the Year.”

“I’m focusing on self-growth,” he wrote. “Kurnell is giving me clarity. And perspective. And time to craft my next move. Great leaders rise, fall, then rebrand.”

He has reportedly begun sketching out “Phase Two of the Trevor Renaissance,” which insiders say may include a documentary, a redemption ballad, or a collaboration with a local dolphin (still unconfirmed).

Trevor ended his statement with a note to supporters:

“Thank you to the public for your concern, your thoughts, and your unwavering belief in my potential.

I’ll be back soon. Stronger. Softer. Slightly less lawsuit-prone.”

Residents are asked not to disturb him unless they are carrying snacks or career opportunities.