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The Sutherland Shire Gazette

Serving Sutherland Shire's finest satirical local news since 2024

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Sutherland Shire declares independence - now a sovereign nation. Highway toll booths with cars; sign reads "Welcome to The People's Republic of Sutherland Shire."

Sutherland Shire declares independence - now a sovereign nation. Highway toll booths with cars; sign reads "Welcome to The People's Republic of Sutherland Shire."

Sutherland Shire Declares Independence - Now a Sovereign Nation.

Mar 311 min read

Aerial view of an empty Cronulla Sharks football stadium beside apartment buildings, surrounded by trees. Headline: Exclusive Investigation on 'North Cronulla Surf Club Virus' by Harper Vale.

Aerial view of an empty Cronulla Sharks football stadium beside apartment buildings, surrounded by trees. Headline: Exclusive Investigation on 'North Cronulla Surf Club Virus' by Harper Vale.

Mysterious Delay Syndrome Spreads: Sharks Leagues Club Caught ‘North Cronulla Virus’

Mar 291 min read

Smiling female news reporter with a microphone on a beach. "Sutherland Shire Gazette" text overlaid. "Vote for Us" Local Business Awards badge visible. Text Headline: Breaking: Journalistic Excellence or Sheer Desperation? Sutherland Shire Gazette Nominated for Local Business Awards

Smiling female news reporter with a microphone on a beach. "Sutherland Shire Gazette" text overlaid. "Vote for Us" Local Business Awards badge visible. Text Headline: Breaking: Journalistic Excellence or Sheer Desperation? Sutherland Shire Gazette Nominated for Local Business Awards

Journalistic Excellence or Sheer Desperation? Sutherland Shire Gazette Nominated for Local Business Awards

Mar 261 min read

Cafe scene with people drinking coffee. Menu hangs on the wall. Headline "Brewxiety" sweets the shire as coffee prices soar - residents now ducking, dodging, faking phone calls to avoid coffee shout".

Cafe scene with people drinking coffee. Menu hangs on the wall. Headline "Brewxiety" sweets the shire as coffee prices soar - residents now ducking, dodging, faking phone calls to avoid coffee shout".

“Brewxiety” Sweeps the Shire as Coffee Prices Soar—Residents Now Ducking, Dodging, and Faking Phone Calls to Avoid Coffee Shout

Mar 242 min read

Large mulch pile in front of a house with five people in safety vests inspecting it. Text reads: "BREAKING: Woronora Man Falls for 'Free Mulch' Advertisement, Now Declared Missing Under It. Sutherland Shire Gazette"

Large mulch pile in front of a house with five people in safety vests inspecting it. Text reads: "BREAKING: Woronora Man Falls for 'Free Mulch' Advertisement, Now Declared Missing Under It. Sutherland Shire Gazette"

Woronora Heights Man Falls for ‘Free Mulch’ Advertisement, Now Declared Missing Under It

Mar 232 min read

Group of men in sportswear on a soccer field, practicing drills. Text reads: "Local Dads in Panic After Volunteering as Coaches."

Group of men in sportswear on a soccer field, practicing drills. Text reads: "Local Dads in Panic After Volunteering as Coaches."

Local Dads in Full Pre-Season Panic After Accidentally Volunteering as Soccer Coaches

Mar 221 min read

Seniors dance on a beach, smiling and celebrating. Text reads "Seniors Festival 2025: Boomers Take Home TikTok Dance-Off Trophy."

Seniors dance on a beach, smiling and celebrating. Text reads "Seniors Festival 2025: Boomers Take Home TikTok Dance-Off Trophy."

Seniors Festival 2025: Boomers Take Home TikTok Dance-Off Trophy - Youth Left Mowing Lawns

Mar 202 min read

Man in white car with "URGENT DELIVERY" sign. Headline: Caringbah Chemist Caught—Scripts from Miranda Pharmacy. Urban background.

Man in white car with "URGENT DELIVERY" sign. Headline: Caringbah Chemist Caught—Scripts from Miranda Pharmacy. Urban background.

Caringbah Chemist Finally Caught—Scripts Are Actually Coming from Miranda

Mar 192 min read

Pharmacist assists woman in busy store filled with medicines. Sign reads "EXPOSED: The Great Chemist Conspiracy." Discount banners visible.

Pharmacist assists woman in busy store filled with medicines. Sign reads "EXPOSED: The Great Chemist Conspiracy." Discount banners visible.

EXPOSED: The Great Chemist Conspiracy - Why Does This Discount Pharmacy Move at Snail Pace in Caringbah but at Warp Speed in Miranda?

Mar 172 min read

BMW with raised wipers in a parking lot, Westfield building in background. Sutherland Shire Gazette headline: "BMW Driver Confuses Rooftop Car Park for Tetris Challenge."

BMW with raised wipers in a parking lot, Westfield building in background. Sutherland Shire Gazette headline: "BMW Driver Confuses Rooftop Car Park for Tetris Challenge."

BMW Driver Confuses Rooftop Car Park for Extreme Tetris Challenge — Casualties Include Common Sense

Mar 162 min read

Five people in heated debate at a wooden table by the beach. Text above: "EXCLUSIVE INVESTIGATION: What Exactly Is a Numbnut?"

Five people in heated debate at a wooden table by the beach. Text above: "EXCLUSIVE INVESTIGATION: What Exactly Is a Numbnut?"

Deep Investigation Launched: What Exactly Is a Numbnut? Shire Locals Locked in Heated Debate Over Definition.

Mar 152 min read

Blakey Johnston leads Cronulla to Victory Smashing World Record for Biggest Paddle Out in Support of Youth Mental Health

Mar 142 min read

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